Thursday, 24 April 2014


   Someday you'll remember waking up, not ready to get out of the secure cocoon of your covers. You'll remember averting your eyes from your reflection every time you stood before a mirror. You'll remember every step you took, making you wish you could shrink into nothingness. You'll remember feeling invisible as glances sweep by, rejected as you stand on the fringe of a circle. You'll remember walking home alone, evenings spent dreaming of a better life. You'll remember nights spent crying yourself to sleep, craving for a hug or just a pat on the back to get you through.
   Someday you'll rediscover the safe haven you had built to take you away from everyone, and everything. You'll remember the joy and strength it gave you...before it too turned traitor. You'll remember how the realization that you had nothing and no one finally hit home. You'll the remember the sleepless nights that followed, and the thoughts that rattled in your head, refusing to leave.
   Someday you'll remember when you finally gave in. You'll remember picking up the kitchen knife, carefully choosing the one with most potential. You'll feel sick in your stomach as you hide it when you walk past your sibling watching TV in the living room, and enter the bathroom. You'll remember sitting on the bathroom floor for over two hours, knife in hand. You'll remember the first few superficial cuts you made, just to get to know how it feels. You'll remember hearing your sibling call out, "Hey, what are you doing in there for so long?" You'll remember closing your eyes, breathing in deeply, and telling yourself over and over "Just do it."
   Someday you'll remember that feeble voice in your head that had been trying to make itself heard for so long, over the tumult and rush of each day. You'll remember how it whispered, "We'll make it through. Things will get better." You'll remember how you finally listened to it, letting the voice grow stronger until it filled your head with hope and encouragement. You'll remember walking out of the bathroom, knife in hand, to put it back in place. You'll remember how liberating it felt to give yourself a second chance.
   Someday you will think of where you are, and the changes it took to bring you there. You'll greet each new day eagerly. You'll smile at the face in the mirror. You'll be amazed at the wonders of being in control of your life. You'll be aware of the difference your presence in the world makes. You'll know by then that the person who can make you happiest is yourself. You'll realise that the person you most need to be loved by is yourself.
   Someday you will look back and you will be glad you didn't let go. You'll be proud that you held on.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...